E Pluribus Unum

by shep

The past few months have completely exposed right-wing media bias. On issue after issue, the beltway media elites have taken up the Republican position, in direct opposition to majorities of the public. On Iraq withdrawal, the US Attorney scandal and the Pelosi ME trip, major media figures have even been caught telling the public that their majority view is really the minority view.

And I’m sure that when Andrea Mitchell tells the American public that they want Scooter Libby pardoned for perjury and obstruction of justice, when they obviously don’t, it’s not because she doesn’t believe it or because she is drunk (probably).

But she has drunk long and deep of the Republican Koolaid. She has friends who serve it at their cocktail parties. Her colleagues enjoy and laugh over the stuff. She has financial interest in its success as a popular beverage. She has staked her journalistic reputation on its nutritional value.

In other words, she is just as impervious to reason and facts as the rest of the Republican cult. More so, because the average Bushbot hasn’t got millions of dollars (and the corresponding lifestyle) hanging on fealty to that belief system.

So, how will we fix our Fourth Estate problem? Their elite status insulates from the great unwashed masses. They hang with similarly reality-challenged colleagues. Their ethical standards place their duty to inform the public somewhere down the list, below success and peer-pressure. They have satisfied themselves with the conceit that giving equal voice to the politics of the left and the right is the same thing as responsible journalism.

And, let’s face it, Democrats are just too committed to civil discourse and so cowed from the repeated ass-raping they’ve received during the last 15 years of their abusive relationship with the press, they just can’t confront their abusers.

What can I say, except: Get. Over. It. The only thing we have left to bring these pampered press poodles to heel is ridicule.

First, being popular and well-liked (especially by the powerful) is like oxygen to these people. Look at how they debase themselves, just to be ridiculed by power elites. To them, the social relationship – politics – trumps war crimes, treason or practically any abuse of official power. You need to be outside David Broder’s circle of friends and get caught getting a blowjob to merit impeachment.

Second, they frequently deserve it because of the asinine things they say as if they make sense. When David Gregory asks about Nancy Pelosi’s “shadow foreign policy,” he should get the derisive response he deserves (see below). Failing to ridicule such absurd and obvious propaganda, gives it instant legitimacy.

Third, Democrats will be doing the press a favor. Traditional media is going down in flames and the current reality-disconnect has to be a big reason for that. They need some tough love if they are going to rebuild the integrity and credibility of American journalism.

Let me show the Dems how this will work. Here are some handy phrases, which can be deployed as necessary, in response to obvious right-wing idiocy (you’ll need a lot more but I thought I’d get you started):

How ridiculous, David.

That’s crazy, [insert journalist’s name here].

Who would be dumb enough to believe that, [insert journalist’s name here]?

Who believes that nonsense, [insert journalist’s name here]?

That’s baloney, [insert journalist’s name here].

That’s just plain dumb, [insert journalist’s name here].

I hear this silliness over and over, [insert journalist’s name here].

The press may like these made-up controversies, [insert journalist’s name here].

Why would any thinking person believe that, [insert journalist’s name here]?

Sounds like the Republicans making up stuff again, [insert journalist’s name here].

More right-wing noise machine, if you ask me, [insert journalist’s name here].

Who’s peddling that hogwash, [insert journalist’s name here], Rush or Drudge?