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We'll Die In A Torrent Of Hell's Fire Unless You Vote Republican

So much for Mark Foley.


[By] late last week, when U.S. officials grew increasingly certain that North Korea would detonate a nuclear device, there was a sense of resignation in Washington—almost a feeling of relief that, at long last, strategic clarity had arrived.

Translation: We're all going to die in a torrent of hell's fire unless you vote Republican.

"At least there would be a unified front against North Korea" if Pyongyang tested, one senior official told NEWSWEEK on Friday. "And it would light a fire under some parties." He was referring to China.
Translation: We're relying on China to bail us out here and why the hell not? They've bailed us out before by buying up all our debt.
But U.S. officials had become increasingly frustrated by China’s reluctance to squeeze Pyongyang harder. In the past, even when it was displeased with Kim, Beijing has done little more than temporarily interrupt fuel flows. The hope in Washington is now that Chinese President Hu Jintao will decide he’s finally had enough of his out-of-control former junior partner.
Translation: China can do more, but what will they want in return? And, whatever it is, are we confident that we can we afford to pay their price?
Washington is gambling on quite a number of still-untested premises.
They do that a lot don't they?
It is gambling that Hu Jintao will be angry enough to sponsor a strategic shift in his country’s view of North Korea; until today Beijing has been reluctant to do anything that might lead to regime collapse. And it is gambling that the regime itself is moribund.
Translation: We'll be greeted as liberators!
The North Korean regime's ideology, called juche, is often simplistically defined as Korean self-reliance and ridiculed in the West. But to the North Koreans, juche is a powerfully intoxicating brew of traditional Korean xenophobia and nationalism, Confucian respect for authority and utopian Marxism-Leninism. The result is "an impermeable and absolutist state that many have compared to a religious cult..."
Hey that doesn't seem so bad -- it sounds like someone Washington could do business with.


Might just be. If so, can we put aside our asbestos wet-suits?

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